Projects

I have soo many projects sitting in my sewing room waiting for me to get up the creativity and energy to start them!

I feel like I am in such a funk, such a rut, not quite sure how to get out of it.  I'm not depressed pretty happy with my life at the moment just feeling a bit like i'm stuck in a creative fog and I can't seem to find which way is up.  I will get there I guess it's just a matter of starting and it will all flow on from there!

I still really really want to open my comic book store asap but the major stall for us at the moment if capital or how to raise it. My current business uses my hands and I am not going to be able to physically do that from my longer as I have nerve damage in my wrists and ulnar neuritis in my elbow so major fun and games lol.

Things will work out and get better I am sure!

Like a slap in the face

Today it hit me like a slap in the face when i weighed myself and then hubby weighed himself and OMG there is only 4 kgs between us! Him being only 4 ks heavier than me! That is sooo not ok!

So i am going to try and lose the 14 kgs that I desperately need to shift asap! I have done weight watchers before and that did work for me but the new point system they have didn't so not quite sure which road to turn down.  Our current diet is organic and full animal fat and raw milk etc etc so it would mean a major major change in the way that we eat as a family.

Any tips or tricks or things that have worked for you to take it off and keep up motivation would be great fully received!

itching

I am itching to start a new business.  My Husband and I really really want to open a comics and collectables store. There is not one where we live and we think it would be great business opportunity.  It's all i can think about at the moment.  I know change of pace but just thought i'd put it out there lol.

Crisis

We are having a crisis at the moment with L.

Today at school L was caught stealing another persons lunch for the second time in a matter of weeks.

He won't tell us why he did it.  He's not hungry he brings food home everyday.  My hubby and I are at a loss as to what we have done so wrong that L he's resorted to this.

Neither of us has any idea what to do about it.  We understand the implications that L is facing in that he will probably be a social outcast and under suspicion all that time, we also understand that if he does it again that he will most likely be suspended.

Have you dealt with this before? What did you do?

We have gotten in touch with our physiatrist to hopefully get some help asap.

Really at a loss and both of us know that this reflects badly on us as parents and that O will also be tarred with the same brush when he starts school in October.

Really sad and worried.

musings and goings on.

OK so I have just completed that love dare on my husband it was really nice and helped me a lot.  The final dare is to renew your marriage vows so that will have to wait a little while at the moment.

My husband and I are also reading the one year love devotional, every day you read a page and it only takes a minute but it real does make a difference.

I also got us For Men only and For Women only which i have to admit I haven't finished yet but my husband has.

So i am so happy that we are both committed to working on our marriage together.

We are also attending an H2O course tonight which is on for the whole term learning about Jesus and faith so I am hoping that will help me to better get to grips with everything.

Thank you all for your comments and encouragement on my last post, I have decided to start journalling and trying to find the things that make me happy so that I can be a better wife and mother.

A bit of a fragmented post but a post none that less :o)

Failing

Ok i know my last post was all positive, well this one is not.

I feel like a failure, I have withdrawn from my course as i was finding it too stressful.  I feel like I am am failure as a mother and that I am a failure as a wife and home maker.

I don't feel that I am contributing to society or my family in any way.  I have no qualifications or prospects.  I don't work and nor do i want to, in some boring 9-5 retail job with no joy.

I don't know who I am or where I am going.  We stared going to church but I am not getting it.  I am not getting it at all.  I feel no different at all.

I hate my style as I don't have one.  I don't know what i like, I don't have any beliefs, any goals.

I just feel like I am avoiding my life, I am avoiding all life really. I am doing anything I can to avoid living at all costs.

Not sure where to go or how to change.  Just wish I could wake up one day and know who I was and where I was going.  A sense of purpose and meaning.  A real zest for life and living. A hunger a yearning anything is better than this.

I exist, I stagnante, I escape.

Perspective

As i am discovering life as all about perspective.  If you perceive that your life is crap then it will be so, but if you start to look at life in a positive way then it will be so.  Probably not that profound to most but it is to me.  I have always live life worrying about what more could possibly go wrong, but now I am starting to think that life is good and that we can do this and good things are coming to us.

I was majorly stressing about how I am going to do 4 assignments a week on top of everything i have to do around the house and other work but then i thought no I can do this and you know what, I am doing it.  I am getting it all done and just not stressing and it's become so much easier.

So yeah that's my little pearl of wisdom for today lol.

We are possibly going away on our first family road trip this weekend to visit friends that will be an excellent adventure!

Hope you are all having a great week :o)