We are having a crisis at the moment with L.
Today at school L was caught stealing another persons lunch for the second time in a matter of weeks.
He won't tell us why he did it. He's not hungry he brings food home everyday. My hubby and I are at a loss as to what we have done so wrong that L he's resorted to this.
Neither of us has any idea what to do about it. We understand the implications that L is facing in that he will probably be a social outcast and under suspicion all that time, we also understand that if he does it again that he will most likely be suspended.
Have you dealt with this before? What did you do?
We have gotten in touch with our physiatrist to hopefully get some help asap.
Really at a loss and both of us know that this reflects badly on us as parents and that O will also be tarred with the same brush when he starts school in October.
Really sad and worried.
Is there a man(older teen) that L looks up to who is not related to you, that could/would talk to him? L may share more with someone not involved with your family. If there is have them go for a walk, play a game, have a milk shake and have the friend report back with the understanding that you aren't going to go running back to L with accusations.
ReplyDeleteAlso L is old enough to understand the consequences of his actions and what a suspension would mean. Have that serious talk with him or have the psychologist do it.
If he has a career aspiration, use that as a way to broach the subject of honesty and trust.
This is what I would do with Monkey, I hope it's of some help... xxx
I agree, I hope he has someone close to him who he can talk about this with. When I started school there were 2 boys who would steal my lunch and pull up my dress when they sat behind me, it was horrible. But I just want to say that although they did those things back then I know one of the boys is now an awesome grown up despite all the trouble he got into at school.
ReplyDeleteThanks Michelle :o)
DeleteAnother thought - is he very bright? He could be bored and boredom can present as disruptive antisocial behaviour...
ReplyDeleteWe believe that he is very bright and we have tired to get some help so that we can harness that but no avail so far.
DeleteWe don't really have any old boys that we know that could talk to him. We have a police officer friend who could talk to him? We could also have the pastor at our church have a talk with him? Really at a loss as to what to do really.
Google gifted new Zealand and ask them how you go about getting him help or an assessment for giftedness. The other thing may be finding him challenges that he wants to do to use as collateral for good behaviour.
DeleteMaybe he needs to join cubs or something similar?
I'm not entirely sure what the next step is... A police officer is a step to far (at the moment) and a pastor may not be the right person to talk to him either but ask the pastor if there is an older sensible teenager who may be interested in being a "big brother".
I hope you find an answer soon xxxx